Wednesday, October 31, 2012

in loving memory...

when i was asked what i wanted to do on the day my gynae told me that we had lost honeystar.... i said i wanted to go to the nurseries in Sungai Buloh as i wanted to buy this plant that so warms my heart looking at it... i knew exactly what i wanted....
 
i wanted a maroon frangipani... i look at the plant everyday and waited for it to bloom.... i felt the warmth of my dearly missed honeystar as i looked at my dearest frangipani.... honeystar would have been close to 7th month pregnancy....
 
to you, my sweetest honeystar....i dedicate...
 
 

 

Monday, October 29, 2012

i had a dream...

islamic literature is one of my favourite subjects during my university years.... it was the days i was exposed to omar khayam, hafiz, rumi, jami etc and never did i came across association between love and intoxication with God until then.... it gave love for God a different dimension...

after more than 15 years....i have a dream.... i was in one of the middle eastern countries and i was visiting a mosque... there came the imaam of the mosque, greeted me and ushered me to a tomb.  i remember what he said as i followed him... this is the tomb of a wali Allah... his name is jalaluddin... i stood there and a moment later, i woke up...

i laid awake for hours thinking of my dream... why God? who is this man? why was i ushered to his tomb? jalal ad din rumi came to my mind... a wali Allah? i asked my brother's father in law who was an imaam... he told me to recite surah yaasin for him....

this dream reminds me of my pre-umrah dream... it was my calling.... i saw what i saw in my dream for real.  this too, could be a calling. there is an urge in my heart....i want to visit the tomb of jalal ad din rumi....i want to be ushered to the tomb....

mysticism and me... how can i explain?

Jalal ad din Rumi







Monday, October 22, 2012

penang....

penang is an island that is so close to my heart for it holds the history of my forefathers, the memories of my childhood and my now for it holds the history of my husband's forefathers as well as his childhood...

i would have been a historian for i have passion for history.  i didn't because i am lazy by nature.  someone told me that i am always living in the past.  oh well, everytime i read history especially one that i could relate to, i seem to have travelled back into history through the time machine... when i listen or read history, my ability to visualise will bring be back and even when i am back to present, there would be hangovers. it linger there in my subconcious mind and materialise in a dream.

my paternal great grandfather,allahyarham mohamed eusoff, is a malaysian citizen (india being his birthplace as well where he passed away) and penang had been the place he settled in his search for a greener pasture.  he had four wives (i am not sure whether there were four all at the same time); two malaysian wives (including a javanese) and two indian wives.  my grandfather belonged to the malaysian wife but she is still of indian origin, a malyalee.  when she passed away leaving six young children, my great grandfather attempted to marry her sister but my great great grandfather objected to it.  therefore, my great grandfather packed all his children and brought them to india to be taken care of his indian wife.  the link in india had never been broken....i have met my great grandfather's youngest wife when i went to india at the age of 11 and my great grandmother's younger sister when i was very little.  that should also tell you the reason why i have tons of relatives.  however, my great grandfather who is of kaasiyaar clan is known to have an attitude and great temper as well as righteousness.  my dad's anger towards events that had unfolded in the past would also explain why he isolated us from almost all of them.  he left penang due to some issues and moved to ipoh and became a self made man...

in my growing up years, the frequent visits to penang and butterworth had always been looked forward to. my childhood and teenagehood lingered around market street, jelutong, bukit mertajam, teluk bahang, the beach, bukit dumbar etc. some of the places, i had forgotten the names....a trip on the ferry and ice cream had always been a must....

oh well.... i grew up listening to my dad relating to us stories after stories, my dad is the best orater i have known since i was a lil girl....i used to listen to him in awe...

when i started working, it extended to bandar perda for the TNB offices are there, thus my frequent visits continued...and guess what, i had married a penangite...what can you say more....

here are moments i caught when i went to penang on work purpose....

swimming pool is a must...













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hawkers...






king street...belongs to my husband's history...



i missed beca ride....when i was lil, my dad would allow us to go on a ride in it...



this is on market street...it belongs to my mum's cousin's husband.  i have been to this place ever since i was a little girl...


here is my third cousin and my uncle...

my dad's childhood days....queen street...



the business expanded...

we called it roti benggali but according to my dad, it is roti panggali (if i can translate it right, it means shareholders).  my grandfather used to buy for us whenever he came to visit...

this is where my husband buys his roti panggali...




the penang cosmopolitan view from a distance....


here are some moments of my last visits that mostly lingers around my husband's family....

the same ride on a ferry...





my favourite view...
 

she is always so full of life...



 



masjid kapitan keling...
 
apparently, there is a queue here every night... nasi beratur..i just know this year that it belongs to my relative...


opps, he injured himself at my mums...
 
and she lost her first tooth...


my cheeky monster...
in the plural sense...




this is their paternal great grandfather's house...








their grand uncle...


my husband's first cousin...

i love the design and landscape of this house...







this is my mother in law's family...

my husband's maternal grandfather's house

the graves of the arwahs my husband's maternal side..
his uncle...

his grandmother
his uncle
 
his uncle


his gandfather


the arwah's of his paternal side...

his great grandmother

his grandfather
his grandmother


we went to visit one of his paternal uncle's and found this old pictures... his allahyarham father is in between the two men in kopiah



part of my husband's aunties...


his allahyarham uncle is behind the groom...

this is the groom above's father in law... caught my attention as he looks like mr. jinnah of pakistan....



my side of memories.... we visited my dad's cousin, my aunt who cares and loves for my dad the most.  i captured some of the old pics as well...
 
this is my dad's second cousin's emak angkat... my dad's aunt used to cook for this couple.  mrs. Brown lived in Penang and Mr. Brown lived in Vietnam.  in her old age, Mrs. Brown used to live with my aunt's family and left to US when she was really old.... i am not sure if this couple had children...


my dad in his younger days... the fairest of all heroes...

if you look at this picture carefull, you will see one of the most successful film producer in malaysia... i am not going to name him... these are all my relatives from my great grandfather who had four wives...

the one in blue sari is my dad's sister...my only aunt from both my mum and dad's side... she married one of my great grandfather's grandson...she is the only one who looks like my grandfather... my dad looks a mix between my mum's dad (his uncle) and his mum... my uncle has that similarities too i think... i love this pic the most since i now knows how she looks like.  i have only seen her once in my lifetime when i was little and i can barely remember her.  i remember crying when i saw her though... the two men in this pics are brothers and my dad's cousins.  their grandmother is my great grandfather's youngest wive... hehehe i wonder how the As Sauds keep track of their family tree...


this is my husband's great grandmother's house... they had maintained this house so so well.... i feel like it is a privillage to be here... this house could be close to a decade old...




time on the ferry on the way home...

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