no question is a stupid question

i have been going around for quite a bit already this financial year conducting some form of compliance audit... i realised that as policy makers, we need to educate the implementers first to ensure their comprehension before we review the compliance level...also, we should be able to anticipate queries and problem faced by them before we are able to brand anyone non-compliant...

so, i tell them to post their queries to the policy makers and i assure them no question is a stupid question.... as i said it i realised that there is so much truth in it.... it is easy for us to label a question as stupid question but from the point of the person who asked the question, it is a genuine concern... it is only when you address people's concerns will you be able to impart all that you want them to understand.... if there is a hanging question at the back of their mind, they will never be able to absorb any of what i am disseminating to them...

some people refrain from asking questions as they themselves believe that their questions are unworthy... by being such a prejudice, they have held back themselves from learning something new and it could be something very necessary for them...and in my context it is crucial when they are the policy implementers and not policy makers...why is there an ancient saying...malu bertanya sesat jalan (if you are shy to ask, you will find yourself lost)...

and i am an adamant believer of no question is a stupid question... if you were to chide one for his question....rest assured of finding yourself in the same situation one day....

my pearls of wisdom for tomorrow's children...

facebook has made the world feel boarder less...i was chatting with my neighbour's son who is in London on christmas eve... you see, his mother likes it if i befriend and chat with her children as she thinks that i could motivate them to aim for success in life.... it is an honour for me...

i have written about them once as i was inspired by them... here's the link.

while i was chatting with him, i asked him his future plans etc.... i found myself sharing with him some of my thoughts which may seem like an advice.... i didn't realise that i was capable of a genuine heartfelt piece as if i was telling my own children...when i re-read them, i felt that i should pen it in my blog hoping that one day my children will read it...

among the things i told my dear ash while discussing his future plans after high school are...

• make the best of time being alone.... we must always be our own best friend... a friend of mine told me once when i couldn't cope being alone....
• you have to employ me to manage your career (this is to ensure i have secured a job for myself)...
• i will make you a real rich man but but there is something i will advice you... i will share with you what i prayed for me children when i was expecting them... i said to God, God, please make them very rich and please give them the heart to give as much charity as possible...u see, God has enough for the entire human kind to live but he also said give zakat and sadaqah..it is through zakat and sadaqah will God sustain the poor..God created some poor and the needy to test the rich
• and when God sees a rich man who gives the poor, He will give more because it is through you does God sustain the poor...see, God doesnt come in person...but through other people....and the first is our mothers...when they are happy with us, God is happy...
  you must have the heart to give in thousands and deep in your heart you will be ikhlas to say, it will come back to me in multiples... ikhlas is important.  see, mothers are like that...what i am telling you is in the place of your mum..your mum always wants me to talk to her children and depart good things..for that i thank God, for there is a mother who thinks i would do good for her children...
• with that dream on a good life ahead of you...it is God, your parents and good deeds that makes you a successful man...stay close to it and you will insya Allah make it big in life...always be humble for all that you have is temporary...God can retract everything so count your blessings and thank HIM always....take care son....i am proud to know you....count me in your fan club
• if i can make a difference in anyone's life, i am grateful to God for He chose me to be....be inspired by great men and also look around you....look at your mother, be inspired...think big...make it big in life....be successful in everyway....dont touch anything if you are bound to fail...must be strategic as life is short....no time for trial...there is no dressed rehearsals in life...it is always performance day so, be prepared....

so children of the world....May God bless you and protect you in life....bless you to be successful beings in everything you do.... 

confinement diet

i am sure many would be wondering how to go about confinement diet... i guess i will share with you some valuable information that you can practice in addition to your mother, mother in law, step mother, sister, sister in law, auntie, neighbour's tips...

my source of information is my mother, grandmother, sister, mother in law and the list goes on...add google to this list!

- bath with real hot water...
- drink ginger tea made with a teaspoonful of dried ginger powder and boiling water.. add some rock sugar, if you want...
- drink smashed and boiled red dates water (remove the pulp)...
- drink extracts from blended fresh turmeric (remove the pulp)...
- drink/eat fenugreek in whatever form you can... i put a teaspoonful in my mouth and drink as much water.  some would make a tea from dried blendered fenugreek...
- eat spring chicken cooked with post partum mixed herbs (get it from indian grocery shop) and ginger/garlic/fresh turmeric/galanga
- eat spring chicken soup with the same as item 4 but add dried longan (get it from the chinese sensei shop)...

i shall add to this list soon...

the best thing is to google and read up...decide on a method that best suits you and your lifestyle...i prefer the grandmother's way for my mom does it that way...it bonds the mother and daughter like no other period in a lifetime...

don't forget to keep yourself warm, engage the services of midwife for a good massage (not those relaxing massage for there is no value for money) and rest well.

miss nadia nasira lost her first tooth

i wasn't prepared for this.... not at her age... i thought it was too soon... there goes another turmoil within me asking questions like had i gone wrong somewhere somehow.... is she getting enough calsium... the four Wives and a Husband kind of questions...

 

miss nadia nasira complained that her bottom tooth (one of the first to appear) was shaking.  i was shaken inside.  i asked her to leave the tooth alone and not to meddle with it.  in August 2012, she came to me with the tooth...

 

i asked every dentist i know whether it is quite normal for a child to lose her first tooth at the age of 5 and a half.... apparently, yes to some and no to few... of course, i am a babycentre mum and therefore this link made my worries a little less... nevertheless, i started increasing her calsium intake...

 

not long after that, while her permenant tooth was growing, she lost her second teeth in October 2012... so, that is the story... she had lost her first two teeth that first appeared at the age of five and a half.... here's mummy's challenge to ensure that there is enough calcium intake to ensure strong bones and teeth...

 

 

aglio olio

 

this is my favourite... and i am still working at making the best aglio olio.... thank heavans for the italians for coming up with such a simple dish that is so filled with goodness... here is my original... will look for more ingrediants to add...

 

so for now, here it is...

 

garlic, lots of it... note: it is anti bacterial agent...

 

 

prawns...

no mushrooms so i added gratted carrots...

not to forget spagetti...

italian chilli paste.... not sure when i can get it again...i love them...

italian herbs...

i sneaked in some sesame since the goodness is wonderful for the children...

the magic of italian cookings... olive oil...lots of it adds to the taste...

the final product....

my children loves this and thinks mummy is a wonderful cook... let's make this more tastier the italian way....time to google...

precious moments...

there are days in my life that i want to be alone... these days, private moments are rare and precious...

 

i used to having such days so many years ago....while waiting for my friends, i would sit at my favourite cafe at the KLCC twin towers having my favourite jasmine tea and watch the world walk pass me...  these are moments when i would reflect on a lot of things... people, life, religion etc...

 

this morning, i had the opportunity to enjoy my private moments again... only that i shared it with someone across the globe on facebook...

 

since the cafe at my office building had been closed for renovation and my breakfast partners are either away or didn't call, i drove to gerai kak noor which is at workshop where only the workshop and despatch boys go.  kak noor serves the best food in the entire HQ office.  i sat there at the little open stall eating roti jala and drinking hot tea... it tasted heavanly. 

 

from where i was sitting, i could see the lrt track and trains to and from bangsar station passing by non-stop signifying the time that is ticking by...i could see the skyscrapers around mid valley city, one of the city's prime area soaring the sky, symbolising all that is not of the little stall i was sitting in... yet, i felt so comfortable sitting there wishing i could eat nasi kerabu (i eat big breakfast)...while having a monolog with someone in the other side of the world...i didn't even know he replied my messages as i did not refresh to see if he had replied...thus, the monolog....

 

i was thinking of my dad...my dear dad.... the words his doctor uttered to me yesterday made me cringe with pain... he is slowly going downhill... i want to be with him when he breathe his last....i pray to Allah to make that possible for me, insya Allah... i am his pet, yes, i am.  tears roll when the flashbacks of all my memories with him play before my eyes... i see me the little girl...the moment when i would sleep in his bed knowing that he will not move me to my own instead would sleep hugging me...i see him picking me up from my primary school sports activity telling me not to wear knee length pants ever... i saw him standing outside the hall when i went to pick up my main exam results and showed him the sheet with tears rolling down my cheeks... it was one of his proudest moment when he saw his pet had gotten a stream of As...

 

i finished my tea, looked at the trains and the skyscrapers... i looked at my mobile to see if i had any facebook messages....i picked up the car key and left the stall... thanking God for the tranquil serenity of the private moment God had granted me this morning...

 

yet, however precious these moments are, i hate to be alone on a permenant basis... i hate emptiness, i hate loneliness... i am thankful that i am surrounded by my family and friends... thank you God...

in loving memory...

when i was asked what i wanted to do on the day my gynae told me that we had lost honeystar.... i said i wanted to go to the nurseries in Sungai Buloh as i wanted to buy this plant that so warms my heart looking at it... i knew exactly what i wanted....

 

i wanted a maroon frangipani... i look at the plant everyday and waited for it to bloom.... i felt the warmth of my dearly missed honeystar as i looked at my dearest frangipani.... honeystar would have been close to 7th month pregnancy....

 

to you, my sweetest honeystar....i dedicate...

 

 

 

i had a dream...

islamic literature is one of my favourite subjects during my university years.... it was the days i was exposed to omar khayam, hafiz, rumi, jami etc and never did i came across association between love and intoxication with God until then.... it gave love for God a different dimension...

after more than 15 years....i have a dream.... i was in one of the middle eastern countries and i was visiting a mosque... there came the imaam of the mosque, greeted me and ushered me to a tomb.  i remember what he said as i followed him... this is the tomb of a wali Allah... his name is jalaluddin... i stood there and a moment later, i woke up...

i laid awake for hours thinking of my dream... why God? who is this man? why was i ushered to his tomb? jalal ad din rumi came to my mind... a wali Allah? i asked my brother's father in law who was an imaam... he told me to recite surah yaasin for him....

this dream reminds me of my pre-umrah dream... it was my calling.... i saw what i saw in my dream for real.  this too, could be a calling. there is an urge in my heart....i want to visit the tomb of jalal ad din rumi....i want to be ushered to the tomb....

mysticism and me... how can i explain?

Jalal ad din Rumi

penang....

penang is an island that is so close to my heart for it holds the history of my forefathers, the memories of my childhood and my now for it holds the history of my husband's forefathers as well as his childhood...

i would have been a historian for i have passion for history.  i didn't because i am lazy by nature.  someone told me that i am always living in the past.  oh well, everytime i read history especially one that i could relate to, i seem to have travelled back into history through the time machine... when i listen or read history, my ability to visualise will bring be back and even when i am back to present, there would be hangovers. it linger there in my subconcious mind and materialise in a dream.

my paternal great grandfather,allahyarham mohamed eusoff, is a malaysian citizen (india being his birthplace as well where he passed away) and penang had been the place he settled in his search for a greener pasture.  he had four wives (i am not sure whether there were four all at the same time); two malaysian wives (including a javanese) and two indian wives.  my grandfather belonged to the malaysian wife but she is still of indian origin, a malyalee.  when she passed away leaving six young children, my great grandfather attempted to marry her sister but my great great grandfather objected to it.  therefore, my great grandfather packed all his children and brought them to india to be taken care of his indian wife.  the link in india had never been broken....i have met my great grandfather's youngest wife when i went to india at the age of 11 and my great grandmother's younger sister when i was very little.  that should also tell you the reason why i have tons of relatives.  however, my great grandfather who is of kaasiyaar clan is known to have an attitude and great temper as well as righteousness.  my dad's anger towards events that had unfolded in the past would also explain why he isolated us from almost all of them.  he left penang due to some issues and moved to ipoh and became a self made man...

in my growing up years, the frequent visits to penang and butterworth had always been looked forward to. my childhood and teenagehood lingered around market street, jelutong, bukit mertajam, teluk bahang, the beach, bukit dumbar etc. some of the places, i had forgotten the names....a trip on the ferry and ice cream had always been a must....

oh well.... i grew up listening to my dad relating to us stories after stories, my dad is the best orater i have known since i was a lil girl....i used to listen to him in awe...

when i started working, it extended to bandar perda for the TNB offices are there, thus my frequent visits continued...and guess what, i had married a penangite...what can you say more....

here are moments i caught when i went to penang on work purpose....

swimming pool is a must...

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hawkers...

king street...belongs to my husband's history...

i missed beca ride....when i was lil, my dad would allow us to go on a ride in it...

this is on market street...it belongs to my mum's cousin's husband.  i have been to this place ever since i was a little girl...

here is my third cousin and my uncle...

my dad's childhood days....queen street...

the business expanded...

we called it roti benggali but according to my dad, it is roti panggali (if i can translate it right, it means shareholders).  my grandfather used to buy for us whenever he came to visit...

this is where my husband buys his roti panggali...

the penang cosmopolitan view from a distance....

here are some moments of my last visits that mostly lingers around my husband's family....

the same ride on a ferry...

my favourite view...

 

she is always so full of life...



 

masjid kapitan keling...

 

apparently, there is a queue here every night... nasi beratur..i just know this year that it belongs to my relative...

opps, he injured himself at my mums...

 

and she lost her first tooth...

my cheeky monster...

in the plural sense...

this is their paternal great grandfather's house...

their grand uncle...

my husband's first cousin...

i love the design and landscape of this house...

this is my mother in law's family...

my husband's maternal grandfather's house

the graves of the arwahs my husband's maternal side..

his uncle...

his grandmother

his uncle

 

his uncle

his gandfather

the arwah's of his paternal side...

his great grandmother

his grandfather

his grandmother

we went to visit one of his paternal uncle's and found this old pictures... his allahyarham father is in between the two men in kopiah

part of my husband's aunties...

his allahyarham uncle is behind the groom...

this is the groom above's father in law... caught my attention as he looks like mr. jinnah of pakistan....

my side of memories.... we visited my dad's cousin, my aunt who cares and loves for my dad the most.  i captured some of the old pics as well...

 

this is my dad's second cousin's emak angkat... my dad's aunt used to cook for this couple.  mrs. Brown lived in Penang and Mr. Brown lived in Vietnam.  in her old age, Mrs. Brown used to live with my aunt's family and left to US when she was really old.... i am not sure if this couple had children...

my dad in his younger days... the fairest of all heroes...

if you look at this picture carefull, you will see one of the most successful film producer in malaysia... i am not going to name him... these are all my relatives from my great grandfather who had four wives...

the one in blue sari is my dad's sister...my only aunt from both my mum and dad's side... she married one of my great grandfather's grandson...she is the only one who looks like my grandfather... my dad looks a mix between my mum's dad (his uncle) and his mum... my uncle has that similarities too i think... i love this pic the most since i now knows how she looks like.  i have only seen her once in my lifetime when i was little and i can barely remember her.  i remember crying when i saw her though... the two men in this pics are brothers and my dad's cousins.  their grandmother is my great grandfather's youngest wive... hehehe i wonder how the As Sauds keep track of their family tree...

this is my husband's great grandmother's house... they had maintained this house so so well.... i feel like it is a privillage to be here... this house could be close to a decade old...

time on the ferry on the way home...